I own a Beretta Jetfire .25acp and a Beretta Bobcat .25acp. I don't recommend them for self defense, certainly not as your primary home defense pistol. They're too finicky and fail easily when they're allowed to accumulate any dirt or crud. I can rarely fire a box of 50 without experiencing failures to feed. That and the fact that the .25 acp is about as low powered a round as you can find. If you can find one that delivers anything over 60 ft/lbs of energy, you're lucky. I bought mine when I didn't know any better. I love the size, very small and they look "Cool", lol! Their only real purpose is as a deep cover back up gun for a last resort. They can certainly kill someone, that's proven, but the chance that you're going to piss them off before they slowly bleed out is quite high. If you're close and can guarantee a head shot or two, then your chances are much improved. A body mass shot isn't going to be as effective as a higher powered caliber. There are several out there for consideration. Generally you'll hear people recommending a 9mm, .40 S&W or .45acp. All of them suitable for the job. The firearm you choose is another discussion entirely. There are so many good firearms available, it ends up being a choice based on individual likes and dislikes. You need to rent different models if you can or hit the range and beg fellow shooters for the chance to fire a few rounds through their guns. Testing them for fit and feel at a local dealer or gunshow helps too. Your finances will also have a bearing on your choice. If you can spend between $500 and $1000 dollars, the door is wide open! That's where most new, brand name models tend to cost. Then comes the decision of semi auto or revolver! That's another story all together! I recently spent an afternoon with a guy that had just bought the new Taurus "Judge". It's also called the Taurus 4410 Tracker. It's a .410/.45LC revolver. They come with a 3 to 6.5 inch barrel, 5 round cylinder, with a choice of 2.5 standard load or 3 inch magnum. Trust me, it's one nasty revolver that has self defense written all over it! Definitely worth a look. A nice pistol that fits the bill for a small sub compact with a decent sized round that your wife might like, including yourself, is the new Ruger "LCP" .380 acp, a terrific little pocket gun that is currently selling retail for around $300 bucks or less.
You've met a group of die hard shooters here and we all have our favorites and most of all, we've got some experience that we're all happy to share! So welcome to the forum, we look forward to hearing from you again soon.