Short story: I just passed the concealed carry training for Ohio today. I'm not licensed to carry concealed yet, but I did purchase a Blackhawk holster for my Ruger SR9C. I had originally planned to go back and buy a Ruger 38 special pistol instead and not use the SR9C as my primary weapon.
Why the hell would I do this, you ask, considering I've only owned the SR9C for eight days now?
Fear.
Yes, you read that right: Fear. I'm having anxiety that (you may get your fingers ready to type a long list of responses) that somehow, the gun *will* go off in its holster. Or lying on the table. Or, perhaps, just go off for no damned reason at all. Now, normally, this wouldn't be an issue, for I had planned to carry but with nothing in the chamber. I'd have to cock it and rack one up for the delivery.
Of course, you can imagine this notion didn't go over well with my trainers (who are police officers), the people at the gun show I went to afterward or anyone else who is currently licensed to carry concealed. THey showed me their Glocks with no safety switches and explained how they carry, no problems for umpteen-bazillion years. Never an 'accidental' discharge. The Blackhawk holster seems to take care of your finger accidentally snagging the trigger.
So, back to the notion of buying the Ruger 38 special. It's a lovely 5-shot revolver and much smaller. It seems easier to conceal and, for some unknown reason, since it's hammer-less (no external hammer, I should note), I feel like it's "safer" My SR9C doesn't have an external hammer, either, but I feel like it's a hair-trigger, and one teeny pull and I"ll blow my leg off.
I'm a big guy - 6'5", 400lbs, quite agile, just big and fat - and I'm wearing the SR9C strapped to my hip right now in the new Blackhawk holster. I'm at home, rather safe, no problems, but the safety is on. I cannot - cannot - seem to get past the notion that, somehow, this thing will go off and take out my leg (as I've loaded hollow-point ammo) or do something on its own...or a demon will show up and yank the trigger, hell, I don't know.
I'm looking (hoping, actually) for a few things here:
1) Rational voices to tell me that this is normal anxiety with a gun virgin, especially one who is getting a "feel" for the holster/gun on his hip;
2) I really don't need to go out and buy that revolver tomorrow;
3) This gun is NOT going to fire on its own, even if I take the safety off
I'm trying not to move too much in my computer chair. I'm concerned that if I put pressure on the gun in any way, I'm going to take out the outside of my right leg.
I now am hoping to hear some encouraging words. Fire (no pun intended) away!